Thursday, February 18, 2010

Breaking up is hard to do

Do you ever break up with your husband? Not really, but in your mind? Like if you were dating, and he pulled that stunt, you would sooo break up with him. And, then he doesn't even know we are broken up, although I look at him and think, you are so lucky we are married!

Reasons for break ups (realize this is all in my mind) through the years:

1. I call to ask him to pick up lettuce on his way home. "Sure, where do I buy that?"
2. On bedrest for three months. He still would forget to feed me, and then got mad at me when I would get up to do it myself.
3. This is an empty can, this is the recycling bin. Hello!
4. This is a dirty dish, this is one of two dishwashers in our kitchen. Hello!
5. The extra kleenex, soda, tp, toothpaste, (fill in the blank) has been in the same spot for years.
6. Buying my birthday cake in a flavor he likes.
7. The Barnes and Noble card for every birthday and Christmas for 5 years. I love B and N, but come on.
8. "You got a haircut!" Ah, yeah, a week ago! When I cut off several inches. Trust me, it's noticeable!
9. Me "Look how loose these jeans are! I can pull them right off without unbuttoning."
Him " How much stretch is in those?"
10. "Do we have any ______?" Did you look? Because sometimes you actually might have to move things around in the frig or drawer to find it. Standing in front of the open frig looking, for 5 seconds, may not be sufficient.

2 comments:

  1. Hilarious! And I Love your hair:) wink wink

    ReplyDelete
  2. Bwahahaha at How much sretch is in those! Men are stupid! ;)

    ReplyDelete